Monday, March 21, 2011

From Extrovert to Introvert by Circumstances...

First, you must know that I am/was currently/once was an extrovert. I was drawn to all things social. I held class or student association office every year throughout high school and college. I was involved in numerous other school and church activities. I always had something going on at my house during the weekends. I can not remember a time when I wasn't a social butterfly...well until now. 


I feel like what was once a social butterfly is going back in time to become a catepillar. I'm no Emily Dickinson (that's who I think of when I think introvert...I know it's a bit extreme), but at times I feel close compared to my former self.  I am not saying there is anything wrong with being an introvert, but I guess I just never expected it to be my story. It feels as though my wings have been clipped. I still like to hang out, but being alone has become quite appealing. But at times, I must admit, this causes a debilating jealousy for those who still have a social life, but I guess I've learned to shurg it off to life. 


Some may chalk this change up to my maturity and need to move up and on, but some think it is merely a chance of circumstances. The theories of both are plausible. Perhaps in my youth I was more prone to want company, but now in my adulthood I am statisfied being by myself. Or perhaps because I have less like-minded people around me available to keep me company, I am less likely to want to hang out and, therefore, have no choice by to be be myself (both theories suck and exploring them further would just make me head hurt, so I'll leave it at that).


I suppose either way I need to be contentment, my ultimate goal in life, which means embracing my new found (potential) introvert personality....*here's to solitude*



1 comment:

~Kell Bell~ said...

Jailyn, you do not, nor have you ever had an introverted personality. This blog screams "lonely extrovert." and that's ok. Here's to your next big move (to Nashville, Charlotte, Seattle, or Colorado- I'll let u know in April where we're moving).