Saturday, March 17, 2012

The Blessings Continue...

Soo in the post below I explained how the Lord work my move out. But that's not where it ends.

My husband moved two months before I did. And I stayed in Huntsville. I didn't know how long it would be before I could move, so I drew a line in the sand. I'm learning to step out when God tells me to step out. It's terrifying, it's the culmination of facing the unknown and perhaps failing.

My biggest fear of moving early was not having the money to do so. While I'm not opposed to be a kept housewife, I had to ask myself is that a financially sound decision? And if the answer is no, there was no way I could move. But I didn't want to be left in Huntsville either. In a way I felt like I had been left out on God's blessing. But Aunt Renee reminded me that God doesn't bless only one party in the marriage. We are a team and God made us that way and he wouldn't do that to us.

I drew a line in the sand, and stepped out on a faith cloud. All I asked is the the Lord support my weight. Not only is he supporting my weight, he is carrying me.

I have been applying for jobs since December. It wasn't until last week I actually got a call to come into for an interview. It had to be one of the worst interviews I had ever had. It was a accounting temp agency. In short the interviewer left a bad taste in my mouth. She didn't ask any relevant questions. And she scoff at my salary request (they add an additional fee on top of your salary request, so if you ask for too much it doesn't benefit them as much...cause a company is going to cap the salary request at a certain point). In all fairness, I think the Lord had sent me a sign to not go to the interview, but I felt like maybe it would help me for future interviews.

My next interview was better. I left the interview feeling confident that I could do the job and it would be a perfect fit for me. But the interviewee told me he wasn't aware when they would be able to hire me. :-/ Um sir, I'm unemployed I need a job sooner rather than later. So that was a bummer, and left me feeling a bit discontent.

No sooner had I left I got call from someone else wanted to interview me later that week. That interview went well also, almost better than the first one because the lady said she was interested in me, and she wanted to make a decision by the next week, which worked well with my open schedule.

No sooner had I finished that interview the first company was calling me back for a second interview. The second interview was good. And this time I was told the position would start ASAP. I left there feeling confident that I would receive an offer letter.

But no sooner than I rested in the idea that I would be working for the first company, the second company called for a second interview. Which will take place on Monday.

I'm TERRIFIED that I will get both jobs and have to choose (but I God's got this!). Both I think are great opportunities at great companies with good benefits that have the potential to offer me the salary I requested (in your face temp agency lady...guess you don't know MY GOD). I don't think I can express HOW GREAT GOD IS!!! *praise break* I don't know what this week holds, but I'm thanking God in advance for his continuous blessings and daily grace and mercy.

Testimony Time: Nothing comes from Nothing

So it has been forever! So I guess there is no time like the present to fill the gaps in.

It's been a busy few months, as you can tell...and I doubt things will slow down anytime soon.

I believe that life is full of testimonies, some big some small. However, it's not always about the size as it is about the impact. I sincerely believe my testimony has been in making for the past two and half years. I'm sure there is more, God is sooo great there is always more. So in essence a testimony is never finished, it almost builds on top of the other testimonies you have.

So my testimony starts about a year and a half after I got married. I had been living in Huntsville for about 3 years then after graduating. And quite frankly Huntsville was getting quite old. For starters all of my close friends had moved away, I hated my job, and so on and so far. I also was in serious odds about my self image (which is still a continuous process). Basically I felt trapped and I felt that my growth was being stunted being in Huntsville. I whined and cried to God about it to no avail. I felt like I was missing out on so many things. I felt like I had made some decisions to end up where I was in life. I just felt tired of being me (I documented some of this way back when feel free to check it out).

So what was my solution to get out of this funk. Employ the philosophy I try to live by on a daily basis it's similar to tests and trials come to make you strong. I like to put a spend on it like this, God is always trying to teach you a lesson just like He did with the disciples. He tried His best while He was here to show object lessons in all that he could. So I try to employ that philosophy. Basic get the lesson and move along.

So back to the testimony...I was in my slump waiting for the Lord to help a sister out. I didn't care how I just wanted it done and done quickly. Finally like a child who feels there requests are going unnoticed I started to act out. Suddenly, after what seemed like months of darkness, I asked the one question that help me pull myself up by my bootstraps. What can I do?

All this time I expected God to perform some miracle and make my life better. I expected him to wave some magically wand and make it all better. But what had I done to change my circumstances, what had I done to make things better? Nothing. Rarely do things happened when nothing is done...nothing comes from nothing.

So in an effort to change things I started with the one thing I felt I had control over. I joined a gym. I started working out like a maniac. It eventually paid off, I lost over 40 pounds. And although my goal was to lose 60 (and in a dream I would have loved to lose 80). One thing that helped while working out was positive thinking. Your body tends to tense up when you stress, stress can literally hold on to pounds for you. So on an effort to not to reverse my progress I tried to release all the unnecessary stress I could. And I started with my biggest stressor, work.

I decided on a career path, for some reason I think I had stalled because it felt so permanent. I had been waiting for some grand opportunity to come along and make up my mind for me. But finally I made a decision and it was like all the chips fell in place.

The last area I had to tackle was my relationships. I started with the first and most important one, God. For a while I felt like we were at a stand still and now I realize I was the only one standing still. And I went down the list after that. For a long time I felt like people had abandoned me when I needed them the most. I had written people off, and didn't really feel like being bothered. But good friends know when you need a friend and that's when they stick around. When they are no longer benefited by being your friend, but when you are benefited by being their friend.

As I made this little changes, taking baby steps life seemed to get exponentially better. I changed my attitude and my attitude increased. And last year again for the 3948th time I asked the Lord with more clarity and more understanding to move us from Huntsville. And that it seemed no sooner than I had risen from knees my husband got a new job. And God showed out!!

So we were finally moving...YAY, all is right with the world right? Not quite. So many questions swirled around in my mind: Where was I going to work? What are we going to do with the house? Where are we going to live? As quickly as I thanked God for my blessing I felt overwhelmed by what ifs. And after finally accepting life as it was, and actually enjoying it, it was changing.

But this time it was easier to pull myself out of my funk because I had seen God work on my behalf. And now I wait for what God has called me to do because until you do something nothing comes from nothing.