Technology @ work

I blogged that last post from my phone...yay me!

Back to real life

So for a while I was caught up in the mystical world of Twitter. It was fun while it lasted, but soon the 'funness' started to wear off. Don't get me wrong I love some of the people I meet, some of the relationships that were established on there. And occasionally I go back to visit and just shoot the breeze. However, it's not the escape it used to be. For a time I thought I needed an escape from 'real life.' I just needed a place to go and get away from it all. A place where making 'friends' was much easier. And I was able to do that will Twitter. I was able to express myself any way I wanted to for people who didn't know me from Adam. It was a very freeing experience. But somewhere my escape became too much like real life. The closer you to get people the more they are able to hurt you and exposing yourself becomes more risky. Things on twitter became complicated. People's personalities started to show...people clashed...attitudes collided. So I took my queue and bowed out.

There are several reasons why I have chosen to spend less time on twitter and doing other things, but the one that sticks out in my mind is my need to take more control over my life. I realized while I was 'escaping' life was passing me by. Yes, I was accomplishing things, but I was going through the motions and not living in the moment. I know I've said several times that people think I have things together and at times I am glad it looks that way, but it is hard work. It's a constant struggle for me to be more and do more. My need to continuously grow comes with all the growing pains. However it is what allows me to, hopefully, defy mediocrity. I refuse to settle for the here and now because it's here and now.

Here's how it goes....

Yikes! Why haven't I written in 9 days?! I've been trying to find healthy ways to occupy my time. Although I think I may now have my hand in too many cookie jars. I am in school again, when boredom gets the best of me…smh. Thankfully this semester is almost over. At the completion of the semester I will have 18 hours of master level management classes enough to teach management on a collegiate level. Next, I volunteered to tutor math. So I tutor Sunday, Monday and Wednesday. On on of my off days, Tuesday, I have class. My time in AYS, the youth service at church on Saturday afternoon, finally ended in September after 2 years . It's bittersweet, but it's on less thing that will take my time. So right now I have Thursday, Friday and Saturday to do some of what I want, but by then I am just trying to rest to catch up with everything else (i.e. homework, rest, cleaning). But I am not complaining cause earlier this year I will bored to death during the week, sort of. At this point the thing I find refuge in is the gym (hopefully going this much will pay off). That's my life in a nutshell right now…until next time...

What's in My Ear....

So I recently got Kirk Franklin's Fight of My Life from 2007 (I know I am late). But I like it…I think Kirk writes good music because of his experiences…not having his father or mother in his life, being raised by his grandmother, his addiction to pornography. I am not going to judge him because that is not my place. But he's human and falls short (no pun intended). I appreciate the message in his songs. Before I go any further let me say this…people write songs just like people wrote the bible…I appreciate message, plain and simple. Anyway, four songs really stand out for me, they invoke thought, which to me is always a good thing.

First, Chains. This song talks about the things that bind us, the things that hinder us from living to our fullest. It challenges you to free yourself. A major part of it is to die to self…and I love that concept. Understanding you can't control anything, so the best thing to do is to buckle in for the ride. …"free me from these chains"…

Next, Help Me Believe. I shared this song with my friend yesterday, just because of one line "...if I never hear I'm sorry, I can let it go…" I don't usually hold grudges. I don't have the patience, and I believe it strongly goes against what I proclaim as a Christian. But I am sensitive and I am hurt often by what people say or do. I cling to that and it causes me to draw back from them, to keep myself safe. It has a great deal to do with a lot of things, but some of it has to do with my pride. For me sorry goes a long way, but I have move on even if I don't get a sorry. It also talks about closing my eyes on this side this and getting up on the other side…which gets me so excited (GEEKED)…"help me believe in what I can't see…"

Then, He Will Supply. The title is pretty self explantory. "...Ask Isreal...Ask Joseph..."

Finally, Whole Nation. There is a reason that it takes a man (sperm) and woman (egg) to make a baby…that was no coincidence. Neither is it a coincidence that it takes two parents to raise a child. Yes, it can be done with one, but two is always optimal. This song expresses to me the need for fathers to be more present. Slight rant: One thing annoys me is how we down play the need for a father in a child's life. They are equally as important as the mother, they have different things they bring to the table, and that should be noted. I am also angered by the father's that allow a mother's hurt, anger, and even wrath to keep them from their child. You have just as much of a right as she does. If she is not comfortable with that, perhaps take some take and make her more comfortable. Don't let your excuse of what is keeping you from your child, be their mother. Sometimes it takes more to be a good parent. Do what you can to make sure you are there for you child. Same thing on the flip side…sometimes you have to put your feelings aside, ladies, to do what's best for you child. I know it's not always that simple, but we've got to start somewhere... End of rant.

Anyway just wanted to share some of what I am listening too...