"Bridling your...mind"

Guarding the avenues of your mind is very important. I don’t know how many of you remember the song, “oh be careful little eyes what you see…oh be careful little ears what you hear…” Anyway this song comes to mind after thinking about a conversation I had earlier in the library. While I was outside of class taking a breather I ran into this guy (we’re more than associates maybe less than friends). Well I started talking to him about different things and we got on the subject of listening to what other say (gossip). He was basically saying that he will listen to gossip but it stops at him because he doesn’t tell anyone else. Does that mean you don’t gossip?

What constitutes gossip? Is it only gossip when it is not true?

In my opinion gossip is anything that has nothing to do with you and it not of vital importance to you. If it is not about you then just leave it alone. Well in trying to convince him that he can always walk away from the conversation, I realized I am just as guilty. I will listen to things being said about people and do nothing. If you think by just listening no harm is done consider this: “By beholding you become changed.” You don’t have to even engage in the conversation to be changed. I guess it goes back to the old saying, “you are what you eat.” You are what you say to or what listen too.

Knowledge is power, and we could all use some power. {*L*}

Grow, GROWing, GROWTH

I never thought I would be this grown. I mean sometimes I say things or do things that remind me that I am growing up. It is sometimes looking from the outside in. When you are young you think the transformation into adulthood is a fast and rapid transition. But then you grow up and realize it isn't. You make mistakes and learn lessons, then you grow. You are constantly growing. I have realized while I was off trying to perfect the "game" of life I was growing. I have began to accept the things I can't change and well, change the things that I can. I will never reach perfection and frankly I am not trying too. I do know for a fact that I am beginning to see the change and I like it. I am not always fully honest with myself but I am learning to be. I am slowly learning to live life without regrets. Life is hard enough by itself and being able to focus on the present. My growth is not complete but I do know that it is happening. As scary as it is I want it to continue. Take a moment and think about what you learned today alone. I am sure that you might surprise yourself. Take a moment and reflect on what major events have taken place in the past year or the will happen. You have taken some small steps and made some major strides. You live, learn, and then...

"Life happens while your busy making plans" -John Lennon :-)

Dreams do Come True...

My dream on Monday kind of came true. It is not completely fulfilled but...I'm hopeful.

Sweet Dreams

I was listening to Kelly Rowland today and there is a song on her album that I love. But not until today have I understood the words so clearly. It was almost like I was telling her what to say. Anyway it made me realize that it is time for me to get off my high horse and tell the truth. Boy...that was hard.

I had a dream that just warmed my heart. I would give a lot to make it come true but here is the thing about certain dreams. They are usually the deep longings in your heart (except for the weird ones, that come after you eat to late). In your sleep you have no control over the thoughts your mind produces. So basically these are almost just random thoughts that come together at one time in your head. Anyway my dream helped me realize that there is more to everything that meets the eye. So in my dream I was on a bench and a friend stopped by to drop off a gift for me. I looked inside the gift and it was ...well that is not important. I said all this to say...you are what you think. So...sweet dreams!

(Oh yeah you know what else makes my dreams great, I usually dream in COLOR) ;-)

ONLY THOUGHTS OF LOVE

I rarely say, "I love you."
But, if I did…
IF I were the type
Inclined to such emotional eruptions
And vocal expression. . .
What would I say to you?
I would probably say
It’s been a long time since I’ve been in love
Or since I even thought I loved.
So long, in fact,
I’m not sure I know what love is, anymore--
Or if I ever really knew.
But, if I even thought I loved someone,
I think it would be you.

--NancySue Krenrich Hamm

What would we do without love? or the people who loved us...despite (whatever)? =)

All I want is...

Okay good news first I registered for my first semester of SENIOR year today!

So what do I want? I want what God wants for me. I can pick and chose all I want but He knows what is best. I have come to the realization that if I want the best I have to wait on Him. I have to let go of all my options and all other reservations and allow Him to come in and take control. It gets scary because you don't want Him to mess up your plan and then you realize...it's NOT about you. Okay so here is some insight into my next short story for all my readers. Once upon a time I had a friend, a really good friend, who I knew God had brought into my life. Why? because I asked Him for this friend. Well in an attempt to hold on to that friend I started to lose my relationship with the Lord. He brought me up and He broke me down. Unbeknownst to me that friend would return but not before I learned my lesson. I guess when God tells you He wants to be first in your life He means it. He is not going to force you but He will give you a the push you need. God is alpha and omega, beginning and end. He was there when it first began and He'll be there after it ends. So this is kind of the jest of my third short story (of course it has more twists and turns), it is called A Shadow of a Woman. If you haven't read the first and second stories you need to get on the ball.

Wow I can't believe this is me talking, I am really "growing" up. Oh by the way I would like to take the time to thank all the people who have made me accept certain things in life that I need to change or keep the same. I know I get angry sometimes when you tell me but that is what I need to hear and it is what true friends are for. Love you guys from the bottom of my heart (and I really mean it!). ;-D

So much to say...

yet not enough words. "Words just can't express, what I feel inside my chest."

Can I Breathe?

It seems like to me since the beginning of this semester everytime I turn around it's something new. Here we are again in that old familiar place, back to square one. Everytime I release one demon another one comes along. I have to be honest with you today I was really ready to move off campus and just finish the semester in my own apartment. The emotional stress of this semester has just taken its toll on me. Well tonight I went to a "Sisters in the Spirit" meeting and what a difference it made in my life. "Sisters in the Spirit" is a group of girls from TX, FL, MD, and now GA since Krystle and I were there. We came together just to have testimonies and prayer. There is so much going on around us that we don't even realize. I have a lot of things to complain about but I have a lot more to be thankful for. We focus so much on our own problems that we become numb to the fact that others are hurting around us. As I sat and listened to those girls talk and cry my problems began to diminish in importance. I am not saying that they are not problems and they haven't strained me but I have so much to be thankful for. I mean despite everything God has sustained me and I have no doubt in my mind that He will continue to do just that if I am faithful. He has brought me too far for me to turn back now.

Sexy Ambitious Ladies Succeeding Always (S.A.L.S.A)

Flowers in the Valley

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down...good thing it's Wednesday and sunny outside.

Showers of Blessings:
I got to wash and vacuum my car today in the beatutiful sunshine. A friend of mine wrote me the nicest e-mail today, it made me night (thanks, Spudnik!). I got like 3/5 on a quiz but I was happy because it was partially right and I thought I didn't know any of it. That is the greatest to think you failed and learn that you didn't. My last class of the day was canceled (well sort of, we all just walked out after 15 minutes). Today was one of those "flowers in the valley" days. Hey guys, Krystle, Kell, Melanie, Matt, Javario, and who ever else reads this. :-D

What I did today

Today I:

- understood something in Finance (and I can do it over by myself)
- drove just to listen to the music
- made plans for the future
- outsmarted authority
- wrote Thank You notes (they were long overdue)
- enjoyed the sunshine
- I moved ahead on an assignment

I conquered today and I feel like that in itself is a great accomplishment. I made a vow to myself a long time ago to make every minute in the day count and for the past few weeks I haven't been feeling like I was doing that. I felt like I was letting myself down so I decided to do an experiment and so far so good. When the minutes in the day count, everything else just seems to flow. Make the most of your next minute, hour, day, month, year, etc. ;-)

Day 5, 6, and 7

Day 5
-Lunch with friends at California Pizza
-Concert at Faith something church (it was pretty good, funny too!)
-Good food, good conversation, good friends

Day 6
-Made it to Sabbath school (by myself)
-Heard a wondeful sermon (great job, Pastor Winston!)
-Dinner with friends and family
-Night out on the town with the girls

Day 7
-Help with sister's birthday tea party
-Drive back to Huntsville with friends

Ten cheers for Spring Break. Postive thoughts bring about positive change. I had a blast this spring break because I wanted to. The Lord blessed and that was that.

Day 3 and Day 4

Day 3

-Rock City, the views were beautiful if you have a chance go visit a natural reserve or something like that
-Warehouse Row, an outlet center (I love to shop, I am gonna dedicate a blog to shopping one day). It wasn't that big but I bought 2 Coach purses and some shirts from Tommy Hilfiger. All in all a day not wasted.
-Movie (at home, it's been a long time since I did that)

Day 4
-Spa, a full body deep tissue message (Need I say more)
-brief trip to the mall (bought nothing!)
-Barnes and Noble (I could spend hours in there and lots of money too)

Three cheers for Spring Break so far!

Candace, Danielle, and Krystle are on their way here. Oh Jacquece is already here. Boy-O-Boy, what will we get in to?

Day 2

Relax. Relate. Release.