Old Memories

Today is corporate wide volunteer day for Target (that is where I am doing my internship). So our Target decided to volunteer to do a cookout at the Senior Community Center. It was very fun and rewarding. We barbecued hot dogs and hamburger, they loved it. After the cookout the seniors were taken inside to watch "Elvis" perform. The majority of the attendees were women and they had a ball. We played bingo, they LOVE bingo, and they didn't even want to stop and eat. But once they did they enjoyed that too (boy could they eat). While cleaning up this little old lady came up to me and she really appreciated it. She started to explain how most of them were widows and they just enjoy coming and spending time with each other and us. That comment by itself made the whole day worth doing. Just to know that the little things you do are appreciated. -Jailyn

The Power of Music

Oh the power of music. I has the potential to soothe, calm, relax or even anger. It has the potential to arouse emotions that you didn't even know were there. Three of my favorite songs (I have so many but these touch me in a special way) are You by Jesse Powell, Dontchange by Musiq, and For You by Kenny Lattimore. I love these songs for the message that they send. These songs are love songs at their finest. I like other songs that have nothing to do with love but these have the most impact on me. Next time you have a chance look up these songs and their lyrics I am sure you'll be touched too. :)

Lighting Speed

The speed of light is known to travel...? Okay well I have no earthly idea, I am a business major not a physics major (but if you know feel free to tell me, I love to learn). Well sometimes it can seem that life travels just as fast as the speed of light. Have you ever taken a moment to think about exactly where you are in life? I mean really sit down and realize how life can fly by. This includes those of you who are making the most of it. I mean no matter how you try to slow it up you can't. That is why I am a firm advocate of living life to the fullest. I mean do what you want to do try to have no regrets. Go skiing, deep sea diving, tell the that special someone you can't live without them. Do whatever it takes in the end to say that you did what you could with what you had. But while on this journey called life make sure that you are helping others along the way. Make sure that you do tell those who mean something to you how much you appreciate them. And cherish the moments of life that make everything seem worthwhile.

Live, love, and be happy. -Jailyn ;-)

Solitude

I have been "privileged" this summer to really enjoy the company of, well, myself. Although this may seem to others as a sign of loneliness (at times it is), to me it can be a liberating experience. It is a chance for me to get to know myself better. Other times it is sheer boredom, at times I almost wreck my brain trying to find things to do. I would love to hang out with my friends but most of them live to far. So I either end up entertaining myself or letting the TV do it for me (although sleep has become a much desired time filler). But all in all it has been a good experience for me because I am going to be an RA this semester in school. I figured I'll be spending a considerable amount of time by myself and this is helping me get used to it. But I been making the most of it so it's not that bad. :)

Question for thought:
How deep are relationships in relation to marriage?

"Ohana"

Ohana is the Hawaiian word for family; to me one of the most important groups of people in the my life. I believe that when it all comes down to it you're family is the one who should be there for you no matter what. Unfortunately this is not always the case because of circumstances such as divorce, adoption, etc. Even then you should still know that you're family is there for you, they might not be together and you might not be bounded together by blood but you are joined together by love and there is nothing stronger.
Divorce is an ugly situation and can damage people far more than people give it credit. The important thing to remember in situation like that is that is not you're fault and divorce does not make anyone love you less.
Adoption is the same way, just because you might not have the same genes does not mean you are less apart of the family than anyone else. You have the same claim to fame as anyone else in your family.
Although this is not always the case remember no matter how far you go a good family will always be there waiting for you at the end of a dark tunnel. -Jailyn :-}

Girlfriends

The UPN show "Girlfriends" is one of my favorite shows. I like the show because it shows young black professional women who have been blessed with each others' friendship. Which causes me to realize how blessed I am to have the same. I am surrounded by a group of young black soon-to-be professional young ladies. Friendships are so important but they need love to grow. Friends are the ones who make certain situations a little better. This is why I don't know where I would be without some of my friends.

To all my friends out there, I love you guys and I truly appreciated everything you have done for me. -Jailyn 0:-)

Jailyn Trivia

Welcome to Jailyn Trivia, if you can answer all these questions correctly GREAT! Let's go!

What is my biggest fear?

What is my major and what do I aspire to be?

What are my parents' occupations?

What is my favorite color?

What high school did I attend and what college do I attend?

Who is my favorite group?

Who would I marry in a perfect world? (This is a tough one, the person is not famous)

What are major some things I look for in a potential significant other?

What are some of my pet peeves?

Name 3 of my closest friends.

Good Luck! If you know me this will be a piece of cake. -Jailyn ;]'

Preparing for things ahead

The Lord has this strange way of preparing you for things ahead. When I was 16 I was involved in a situation that left me with negative views about most guy and girl "friendships."(Hence part of the reason I asked earlier can men and women just be friends). The situation got a little out of hand and I had to step in and finally speak my mind. Unfortunately that didn't go over very well it was like my opinion or perhaps feelings didn't matter. The funny thing is that you never know when you will have to deal with the same situation or the same people again. When the situation happened the first time I was devastated at the outcome and hurt by the actions and words of those involved.
Fortunately four years later and a lot more mature the situation is a lot easier to deal with. I mean I wasn't totally cool about the situation at first. As a matter of fact I felt as though I had been warped back in time and was 16 again. It got easier as I thought about how it happened four years ago and that seemed to ease my mind. Of course this time I wanted to be a little more descriptive when I told the person my feelings but then I thought why even bother. If the person hasn't changed in four years but I have why go back there. Why revisit a memory that I has tried so hard to delete out of my mind. I guess there are just times in your life that you have to just let stuff roll off your shoulder. -Jailyn :)

Reaching Contentment

Although it has been through up, downs, tears, and much hard work I have almost reached contentment. Reaching contentment is a goal that I want to strive to achieve. This is basically being ability to accept the things that you don't have the able to change. I mean I can't change the way I look without losing a lot of myself so I have found contentment in that. I mean this doesn't mean I am always satisfied this just means I am able to say I can deal with it.

Reaching contentment is not something that is reached easily and it takes time, patience, and understanding. It takes you accepting your faults and strengths and turn them into opportunities.

I can't say I have completely reached contentment in my 20 years. But I know that I will keep striving to I reach that goal. -Jailyn :]

"So Close, Yet So Far"

I am not sure how many of you are familiar with the term "so close, yet so far." It is a term that describes the state I am in now. There is something that I want really, really bad. It so close I can touch it yet so far beyond my reach. This has to be one of the biggest frustrations out there. I mean it's like if you have no job and you want a sports car. Now you can go to the dealership look at the car, test drive it, talk to a salesperson but you have no means to get the car. So basically you're plum out of luck. But let's say you do work, you still may not be able to afford a sports car. So you are closer but not close enough. This leaves you in a bind. And that is where I am now, in a bind. I know I can't get everything I want but this is very different. Maybe the Lord is telling me this is not what I need so I am going to just wait for Him. He knows best.

Anyway I went out of town this weekend and it proved to be a very strange and quite entertaining weekend. Let's see some highlights I had a major breakthrough with a new friend I met. I was able to get to know some people better. And I got a chance to see first hand what it feels like to re-live something you tried so hard to blank out you memory. I'll explain everything later. C'ya -Jailyn :)

"On the Real" # 3

Well so far this summer has been a success I guess (oh, that rhymed). I starting to really talk more at work and that is a good thing (I hope, let's keep our fingers crossed). I will be working overnight next week so that should be lots of fun. But other than that nothing really big is going on. Well I am very tired but just wanted to write so later. -Jailyn ;)

"Independent Woman" and "Bills, Bills, Bills"

Every girl wants to be an Independent Woman. Most of us want to stand up and proudly proclaim that we can take care of ourselves. But is that the main reason to be an Independent Woman? Not necessarily but I have to agree with Destiny's Child when they said "The shoes on my feet I've bought it, The clothes I'm wearing I've bought it, The rock I'm rockin' I've bought it." That has to be one of the greatest feelings in the world. I love that fact that when I get my check I can buy anything I want. I mean if it is within my means it can be mine. Of course, very rarely does it work that way. They also asks some important questions when they said "Can you pay my bills?, Can you pay my telephone bills?, Can you pay my automo' bills? " These bills are not cheap nor are they paid automatically by the financial fairy godmother. Every month just like clock work they are there to reap the benefits of your labor.

I mean for the 20 minutes my check is in my hand before it goes in the bank and into someone else's hand, I feel really like my labor was well worth it. I really feel that the ultimate "Independent Woman." Of course that feeling is gone in a flash but it comes back every two weeks. It really gives me something to look forward to after a long day. :)

I am what I am, and that is the best I can be

"I am what I am and that is the best I can be." -Jailyn

This statement holds more and more true to me everyday I live on. We seem to live in a world where the mask we use to cover our faces seem to be more like the real thing. We have gotten use to the mask and transformed ourselves into what someone else wants us to be. We do it for our mother, father, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc. But why? My philosophy has always been if the person is not willing to do the same for you then why do it for them. You see while your busy changing yourself for them, they are staying the same. This means just as they found something wrong with you the first time they will find something wrong with you again. I guess what I am trying to say is change isn't bad if the motives behind it are positive. Make sure the change is beneficial to you.

I was faced with a challenge the other day to accept something that happened to me a while ago. When the situation first presented itself I thought the end results were all my fault. And I was convinced that they were by the people involved. I tried to change and in the process almost lost sight of who I was. Soon I started to look at myself and what I had to offer. I decided that I had more offer than they had given me credit for. This made me realize that I was so much better than the situation and the people involved. I thought it had been my fault and had tried to change the situation by changing myself. This taught me a very important lesson things aren't always what they seem to be. And also hiding behind a mask will only cover you up for so long soon the real you is bound to come through. >)

More than Friends

Is it possible for men and women to be just friends?

I would have to yes unfortunately in the world we live in it is rarely accepted and is often looked down upon. It is rarely accepted and looked down upon because of the odds that are against it.
Although men and women have several differences a majority of the time they can still be platonic friends. Knowing each other's boundaries is very important. The friendship can be corrupted in an instance when boundaries are crossed. Lines can be crossed in a moment of weakness, like hanging out late at a male friend's place after a heated argument with your boyfriend is not the best thing. This is when you must think level headed. Although you two are just friends you have to also realize a lot of other things are involved like emotions, hormones, etc.

There are times when a simple friendship can turn into more but when is it the right time to cross that line? Well that needs to be a rational decision made by the two people involved.

You know yourself the best. If you feel as though you and a person of the opposite sex can just be friends then do it. A lot of times it helps if the other person is not physically attracted to you. -Jailyn :~)

"On the Real" #2

Hey guys,

Well I am happy to say the older I get the wiser I get. What I am trying to say is the more I mature the better I handle situations. I see myself giving good, sound advice. I feel as though I am turning out well. Even though growing older makes me a bit uneasy, at times, I must admit it is rather exhilarating. I also handle the relationships I am in on a day to day basis better. This level of sophistication is a level only reached by those mature enough to handle. Guess that's why I made it (or at least getting closer).



Question to ponder on: Can men and women just be friends?
-Jailyn ;}

What about your friends?

What about your friends? What makes your friends so special? What makes them the people you want to spend your time with?

Well I don't know about your friends but; my friends are the people I call on for a shoulder to cry on, a person to laugh with, or just a someone to chill with. My friends love me for who I am and that is the best thing they can do. They make "venting" fun. They make virtually everything we do together fun. They encourage me to push harder and be a better person. My friends give me advice (even when I don't ask for it), they listen to me, they make me feel like I matter. They are at times the best backbone to have. That is exactly why I am selective when it comes to choosing friends. Not everyone is a friend I want to have. They are certain qualities I look for in a friend. I don't them take a test or anything but it is important that we share the same values and beliefs.* No matter what I know that I can count on them for anything.

I love all my friends dearly and thank them for all they do and are, including putting up with me. Special thanks to my girls S.A.L.S.A. , Naya, and Kristyn, Monica

*The same things are important in a boyfriend/girlfriend or more.

Moving Out of Your Comfort Zone

When is it safe to move out your comfort zone? Most people construct a comfort zone for themselves by surrounding themselves with situations or people they fill comfortable with. These comfort zones can sometimes hinder people from growing as a person. They can be restricting and cause barrier to form around the person. Closing out new people or new situations. On the other hand some people never settle down enough to form a barrier and this can cause just as much trouble. This could mean that the person will more than likely only rely on himself/herself and can have deep trust issues.

So does that mean that it is never going to be a win-win situation? So when is it safe to break down the barriers and move on? Or start building more trust relationships? The best way to avoid both situations is to give yourself an even balance of change in your life. This can mean anything from trying a new restuarant to trying a new city or job. Going out and exploring, doing something that is not in character of you. To those who have already built up your barrier, you can tear it down a little at a time, you don't have to do it all at once. Try doing small things first and then more on to something bigger. To those who have not built the barrier because lack of trust or for whatever reason, follow the same advice. Start little by little, things will change, hopefully for the better, over time.

Until next time... :} Jailyn

"Comfortable in the Skin Your In"

What exactly is "being comfortable in the skin your in?"

I have found out for me the true meaning is exactly what it says, being able to accept yourself for yourself. That means you judging you for and by yourself. Not trying to fit the mold that others have made for you. Living by your standards and being happy with that.

I believe that it varies in different people. I believe it is the air of confidence that you have. You have to have that confidence or else you will be forced into a mold of someone elses' standards. Being comfortable in who you are. Having the ability to feel "sexy" by your own standards.

"Just be you being you, Love yourself for only you can do it the best, and Live, love, and levitate (rise) far above everyone's expectations" -Jailyn =)

"On the Real" #1

Well everything is pretty cool with me. I am tired from my job I have to leave the house at 6:30 to get there by 7 so I am tired but that is about it.

The people from my job think I am so quiet. If only they knew, just kidding. I am quiet and very shy, ask anyone who knows me.

Well I have to go to bed my eyes are about to close on their own. So long folks. :P

My Take on Love

How do you know when your in love? Does love dissipate over time? Is unrequited love still love? If it seems to good to be true, can it be? If you loved then lost how long will the love (or the pain of it) remain? What makes true love so true?

I've heard the saying there are no good guys out there. Sometimes I want to believe this but something in me keeps telling me to hold on. And as much as us girls say this guys say the same thing. Maybe we are both just getting our wires crossed. Maybe we are both are looking in the wrong places.

I know personally for me it is when I see other people getting together and I am sometimes like man why can't that be me. But I have hope the one day it will be and it will be worth the wait. Yes I do get discouraged but it helps to know that the perfect fit could be out there for me, waiting patiently just like I am.

Blast to the Future

Take a moment and think about where you will be in 10 years? Really contemplate on this...

So how does the future look? Do you like what you see? If so this is the time to seize the opportunity to make it happen. If not then vise versa, this is the time to change what you don't like. The choice is yours (with the help of the MAN who sits on high).

I realized the other day that word association is very important. This exercise is used in therapy to help the therapist help the person open up about his/her feelings. The way you associate the words tells a lot about you, like for me engagement makes me think of marriage. For others engagement may make them think of appointment. Different strokes for different folks.

Word Association (take the first word that comes to mind):

• life
• tears
• happiness
• love
• man (this can be someone special to you)
• woman

All these words mean something different to different people what do they mean to you? If you find any good websites about word association let me know. ;)